Maybe a poker dream is unrealistic for me

miklcct · Monday at 6:43 PM

I always bust out at the final steps before a high stake tournament which I can never afford, then I get tilt and start to shove once I have a less-than-average stack, the SPR ratio becomes low, and believe my chance is more than 50%, and eventually the board won't come in my favour, losing 60%, 80% or even 96% flips and get busted. And now I am losing patience playing those £0.20 tickets given out daily.

If I just want to win money, I am not going to play any satellites, but to play single table sit & gos instead with my £100 bankroll.

My poker dream is that I want to enter a live event in London (as I live in London) but without using any of my own money (since I can never afford it).

PartyPoker's welcome offer included a £25 Round 4 ticket which eventually led to a £1K package (£500 buy in + £500 cash for expenses for a live event) after Round 5. If I could get a seat there, it would mean that I would be paid £500 to play in a live event just a £1.5 train ride away from home. I qualified for Round 5 (no direct buy-in, and my chips were worth £137.73 after Round 4 qualification), and once reached the top of the leaderboard there, I thought I could stop playing anything but premium hands but I was caught up and dropped to the edge of the bubble, still having a long way to burst, not willing to play for large pots. I eventually busted out at that final stage.

Then I started a cycle of playing all the tickets given by the promotion - PartyPoker has a daily offer of 2 x £0.20 Round 1 tickets which are given out when $0.01 rake is paid, and most importantly, rake paid by tickets also count. That means that, once I use the ticket for a raked tournament, I receive 2 Round 1 tickets, which if I use it to enter a raked Round 1 MTT (the Round 1 S&G is rake free) the next day, I will receive another 2 Round 1 tickets again for me to use. These Round 1 tickets expire after 24 hours. There are a few routes I can follow, to the £500+£500 main event, to the £150 mini event, to the £1K high roller, or to the £500 PLO Masters. As there was a large supply of tickets although I aimed for the £150 mini event, I also spent some tickets to play for the PLO as well. But the experience of busting out at the bubble or even reaching ITM with 0 stack for the next stage (these rounds are best-stack carrying qualifiers) is too stressful for me, and it takes too much time to play those £0.20 tickets every day which starts with 50 BB (S&G) or 100 BB (MTT, although I can late-reg it at the last second, the tournaments do not always start at a convenient time for me to play) just to reach Round 2 then Round 3 and get bust at the bubble. And I still have to reserve a block of time on the Sunday evening for the final round every time I decide to play a ticket, and if I am not available on that Sunday evening, I will have to find another tournament before the ticket expires which give me another ticket instead of a direct seat, which may not always be possible for my target.

Now I have already played all my tickets and, after some thought, I registered for a £5 satellite to the final step (no direct buy in) to the £150 mini main event using the P$ given in the welcome offer (although it was an irrational thing to do, I comforted myself for that because "it was not real money"). Then I went bust after losing a 80% and another 96% flip. I closed the poker client immediately.

Maybe that London poker dream is not for me.

SpanRmonka · Monday at 6:57 PM

miklcct said:
I always bust out at the final steps before a high stake tournament which I can never afford, then I get tilt and start to shove once I have a less-than-average stack, the SPR ratio becomes low, and believe my chance is more than 50%, and eventually the board won't come in my favour, losing 60%, 80% or even 96% flips and get busted. And now I am losing patience playing those £0.20 tickets given out daily.

If I just want to win money, I am not going to play any satellites, but to play single table sit & gos instead with my £100 bankroll.

My poker dream is that I want to enter a live event in London (as I live in London) but without using any of my own money (since I can never afford it).

PartyPoker's welcome offer included a £25 Round 4 ticket which eventually led to a £1K package (£500 buy in + £500 cash for expenses for a live event) after Round 5. If I could get a seat there, it would mean that I would be paid £500 to play in a live event just a £1.5 train ride away from home. I qualified for Round 5 (no direct buy-in, and my chips were worth £137.73 after Round 4 qualification), and once reached the top of the leaderboard there, I thought I could stop playing anything but premium hands but I was caught up and dropped to the edge of the bubble, still having a long way to burst, not willing to play for large pots. I eventually busted out at that final stage.

Then I started a cycle of playing all the tickets given by the promotion - PartyPoker has a daily offer of 2 x £0.20 Round 1 tickets which are given out when $0.01 rake is paid, and most importantly, rake paid by tickets also count. That means that, once I use the ticket for a raked tournament, I receive 2 Round 1 tickets, which if I use it to enter a raked Round 1 MTT (the Round 1 S&G is rake free) the next day, I will receive another 2 Round 1 tickets again for me to use. These Round 1 tickets expire after 24 hours. There are a few routes I can follow, to the £500+£500 main event, to the £150 mini event, to the £1K high roller, or to the £500 PLO Masters. As there was a large supply of tickets although I aimed for the £150 mini event, I also spent some tickets to play for the PLO as well. But the experience of busting out at the bubble or even reaching ITM with 0 stack for the next stage (these rounds are best-stack carrying qualifiers) is too stressful for me, and it takes too much time to play those £0.20 tickets every day which starts with 50 BB (S&G) or 100 BB (MTT, although I can late-reg it at the last second, the tournaments do not always start at a convenient time for me to play) just to reach Round 2 then Round 3 and get bust at the bubble. And I still have to reserve a block of time on the Sunday evening for the final round every time I decide to play a ticket, and if I am not available on that Sunday evening, I will have to find another tournament before the ticket expires which give me another ticket instead of a direct seat, which may not always be possible for my target.

Now I have already played all my tickets and, after some thought, I registered for a £5 satellite to the final step (no direct buy in) to the £150 mini main event using the P$ given in the welcome offer (although it was an irrational thing to do, I comforted myself for that because "it was not real money"). Then I went bust after losing a 80% and another 96% flip. I closed the poker client immediately.

Maybe that London poker dream is not for me.

Whereabouts in London?

I used to live in Deptford and would go Aspers in Stratford sometimes for their low buy in daily events, although I haven't checked their schedule recently since it became Gentings.

If you want to play live events then maybe start with these smaller events....I did fairly well, especially in the Redtooth game on Mondays.

Another live place for you to check out is a private club, easy to join in Eltham. The Eltham Terrace Club. They have a £50 buy in on a friday, and a around £30-£40 games on Monday and Wednesday. Loads of regulars there, the standard is decent but not hugely high either. Its a fun night.

If I was you I would aim to try and build your BR in order to play some of these smaller games, get used to live play, then if you do make it to a bigger game you will be more comfortable too!!

Luvepoker · Monday at 7:42 PM

After reading your post I've got a few things I gotta say to you first of all don't ever give up your dream you never know what's going to happen. When I started playing I was just about to have my first child there were topping and there was no money left for things like poker.

So I kept playing micro buy in games. I took the free rolls where I could and my $50 one time buy in on the one site called PokerStars I watched my stack shrink improved my game and slowly watch it turn around. Awhile later I ended up playing a free role on full tilt play small stakes possible with the little bit of money I want and grow it never making a deposit on that site. I've made enough I've never deposited on full site I've played all over the years and I have cashed out.

What I would suggest is try to get some sort of bankroll built up go with the free rolls get some small amount but then play small games not satellites wanted up carefully and solely and you could easily build up a Bankroll but if you do this you need to do it the right way. My advice is to really learn bankroll management if you do this and use proper bankroll management you might be surprised at how you can grow up a stack even from the The smallest of buyins. One of my favorite sites gave me $2.00 to join all i need to do is make a $5.00 deposit to withdraw money. Three years later I moved to the positive few walks to 5 bucks just so I can get my money off if I can do so can yell don't let go of your dream be realistic with it though it may take time some people say it's a waste of time if you're happy that's OK don't worry about them

Now for the record I don't know if you ever read the world where it's become impossible to play online well in the years when I could play even though it was a small stakes I won two entries into the world series of poker I've also been able to pull off some other smaller events. I already got my first kid I figured I'd never have an opportunity to lower the World Series when we've got my second child the same way there was never a it's going forward well what I want my entries in there if I can do this so can you give up your dream .

.

Poker Orifice · Monday at 8:18 PM

I would just keep working on your game & 'maybe' add in the longshot step satellites along with whatever other games you're already playing instead of keeping them in the forefront as your main focus. I'm guessing those games don't take up a lot of thinking energy so it should be easy to just have them running in the background.

As was already mentioned, never say never... because you just never know! I won a trip to Vegas in a freeroll.

phuchoidey1 · Monday at 9:13 PM

Everything always not easy, try small step, then go bigger and hope the lucky

rhoudini · Tuesday at 6:52 AM

It sounds like the satellites themselves are creating most of the stress for you, not necessarily poker as a whole. Those step formats with stack carryover and leaderboard pressure can really mess with your mindset, especially when you get close to the bubble repeatedly. If your bankroll is £100, your idea of focusing on small SNGs instead might actually be healthier. They’re simpler, lower variance, and you’ll get more experience with push/fold spots without the emotional rollercoaster of chasing a package every day. The London live dream doesn’t have to come through a promotion ticket, you could slowly build up and take a shot at a £30–£50 local event someday. It might take longer, but it’ll probably feel much less frustrating.

GrannySmit77 · Tuesday at 10:59 AM

If your dream is to play a bigger live tournament, ideally you should start playing live poker. You can learn to play poker online, it's the same game, but live and online poker play differently. You need to be able to read people and you need to decease your poker tells. If you never played live poker and then you win, say a ticket for a 1 500 pound tournament, your hands will shake every time you put out a bet or have a big hand. They will read you like a book. So just practice more playing live poker. You can start at 1/2 NL, play a lower buy in tournament. You can try to find a job as a poker dealer in your week ends off. Your dream is so achiveable. Imagine all the international players that fly out to Vegas every year. They have all that travelling expenses. And you don't- you live in London and want to play a poker tournament in London.

Sunz of Beaches · Tuesday at 10:59 AM

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I would start here. Good luck to you!

s0ftdumps · Tuesday at 11:10 AM

Losing 80% or 96% spots hurts, but that part is just variance. If you play long enough those spots even out. What matters more is how the format affects your mindset. From what you described, the step satellites are draining your patience and forcing you into stressful decisions late in the process.

Your idea of switching to small sit & gos with your bankroll actually sounds much healthier. They are simpler, you control your schedule, and the results depend more on consistent play rather than surviving multiple qualifier bubbles.

WellAA · Tuesday at 1:02 PM

miklcct said:
If I just want to win money, I am not going to play any satellites, but to play single table sit & gos instead with my £100 bankroll.

Yes, everybody wants to win some dough, just play where you are comfortable and doing great until you take Your br to 1000.

Why not do that while studying a little more your play at those satellites without much stress.

Good luck and see You!

Kasztor007 · Tuesday at 1:52 PM

I don’t think your poker dream is unrealistic the path you chose is the issue.

Step satellites are mentally brutal: long hours, repeated bubbles, high pressure → tilt becomes very likely. That’s not weakness, it’s the format.

What you describe (tilt shoves, impatience) looks more like a system problem than a skill problem.

Honestly:

build your bankroll in simpler formats (SNGs, small MTTs)
study push/fold spots
treat satellites as shots, not your main path

The live dream isn’t unrealistic you just don’t have to rush it.

YLAN · Tuesday at 2:16 PM

miklcct said:
My poker dream is that I want to enter a live event in London (as I live in London) but without using any of my own money (since I can never afford it).

Anything is possible. Good luck... you need a lot of it.

Rmi · Tuesday at 3:02 PM

If you spend time studying, it can become real.

Gagner · Tuesday at 3:37 PM

Keep that chin up and keep grinding. I’m not a lifetime poker winner but after a few years of learning I can make small wins now. It’s a hobby and I have the same dream to win my way to a cool live event. Good luck set a limit and stay within it and never give up.

bazza155 · Tuesday at 4:49 PM

miklcct said:
I always bust out at the final steps before a high stake tournament which I can never afford, then I get tilt and start to shove once I have a less-than-average stack, the SPR ratio becomes low, and believe my chance is more than 50%, and eventually the board won't come in my favour, losing 60%, 80% or even 96% flips and get busted. And now I am losing patience playing those £0.20 tickets given out daily.

If I just want to win money, I am not going to play any satellites, but to play single table sit & gos instead with my £100 bankroll.

My poker dream is that I want to enter a live event in London (as I live in London) but without using any of my own money (since I can never afford it).

PartyPoker's welcome offer included a £25 Round 4 ticket which eventually led to a £1K package (£500 buy in + £500 cash for expenses for a live event) after Round 5. If I could get a seat there, it would mean that I would be paid £500 to play in a live event just a £1.5 train ride away from home. I qualified for Round 5 (no direct buy-in, and my chips were worth £137.73 after Round 4 qualification), and once reached the top of the leaderboard there, I thought I could stop playing anything but premium hands but I was caught up and dropped to the edge of the bubble, still having a long way to burst, not willing to play for large pots. I eventually busted out at that final stage.

Then I started a cycle of playing all the tickets given by the promotion - PartyPoker has a daily offer of 2 x £0.20 Round 1 tickets which are given out when $0.01 rake is paid, and most importantly, rake paid by tickets also count. That means that, once I use the ticket for a raked tournament, I receive 2 Round 1 tickets, which if I use it to enter a raked Round 1 MTT (the Round 1 S&G is rake free) the next day, I will receive another 2 Round 1 tickets again for me to use. These Round 1 tickets expire after 24 hours. There are a few routes I can follow, to the £500+£500 main event, to the £150 mini event, to the £1K high roller, or to the £500 PLO Masters. As there was a large supply of tickets although I aimed for the £150 mini event, I also spent some tickets to play for the PLO as well. But the experience of busting out at the bubble or even reaching ITM with 0 stack for the next stage (these rounds are best-stack carrying qualifiers) is too stressful for me, and it takes too much time to play those £0.20 tickets every day which starts with 50 BB (S&G) or 100 BB (MTT, although I can late-reg it at the last second, the tournaments do not always start at a convenient time for me to play) just to reach Round 2 then Round 3 and get bust at the bubble. And I still have to reserve a block of time on the Sunday evening for the final round every time I decide to play a ticket, and if I am not available on that Sunday evening, I will have to find another tournament before the ticket expires which give me another ticket instead of a direct seat, which may not always be possible for my target.

Now I have already played all my tickets and, after some thought, I registered for a £5 satellite to the final step (no direct buy in) to the £150 mini main event using the P$ given in the welcome offer (although it was an irrational thing to do, I comforted myself for that because "it was not real money"). Then I went bust after losing a 80% and another 96% flip. I closed the poker client immediately.

Maybe that London poker dream is not for me.

Its sounds to me like you are in a mad rush to get a live buy-in ticket, as soon as you turn a round 1 ticket into a round 2 do you try to then turn it into a round 3 and then a round 4 or do you keep the ticket for a while and try to turn it into the next round a few days later?
(Yes the round1 tickets must be play in 24hours but the other do not).

I won 2x £1K packages last year used 1 ticket the week before Xmas at the London end of season, As some player won packages after the events near them Partypoker extended the expire dates on tickets by a year, so my 2nd ticket is valid to the end of this year.
I must of play over 600 £0.20 round 1 ticket (plus other rounds) to get there, so do not get to down about it.

At this time I have 4x £1 round 2 tickets and 1x £5 round 3 ticket, as they are valid for another 2 weeks I am in no rush to play them and will use them to build my rake for the party cases and cashback offers, if I am luck/good enough to turn them into more packages then that a Big Bonus.

Good luck with your efforts and maybe I will see you later in the year live.

miklcct · Tuesday at 6:59 PM

Kasztor007 said:
I don’t think your poker dream is unrealistic the path you chose is the issue.

Step satellites are mentally brutal: long hours, repeated bubbles, high pressure → tilt becomes very likely. That’s not weakness, it’s the format.

What you describe (tilt shoves, impatience) looks more like a system problem than a skill problem.

Honestly:

build your bankroll in simpler formats (SNGs, small MTTs)

study push/fold spots

treat satellites as shots, not your main path

The live dream isn’t unrealistic you just don’t have to rush it.

There is so little traffic on the SNGs on my preferred site where I have a large win rate therefore it is difficult for me to play for volume, sometimes I have to play at a different stake than I prefer because there are simply no players there.

Jyco · Tuesday at 7:45 PM

It’s very difficult to make it from nothing or with a very small bankroll, but if you keep trying every day with consistency, it will always be more possible than if you’re inconsistent and don’t believe in yourself. And don’t judge yourself based on just a few tournaments, since variance can easily go against you with such a small sample. Good luck on your journey.

Happy Bobi · Tuesday at 11:38 PM

You shouldn't give up on your dream. But if you want to achieve it, you have to be realistic and clearly understand what steps you need to take to achieve it.

phuchoidey1 · Wednesday at 12:21 PM

Just 10% player get profit and you in 90% that is very norm, just cconsidered that you buy a lottery or go to another

puzzlefish · Wednesday at 8:14 PM

Maybe not your version of the dream, but you could probably save up some money and just buy in to a live London event yourself. But have you considered what will happen if you go to that live event and bust out with nothing? I get it that it would maybe feel better if it hadn't really been your buy-in to lose, but you're still losing time and your health with stressing over all of this. Poker is a very deceptive game. There's never any guarantee that you're going to run good in the spots that matter most. It's psychologically brutal when you set any kind of expectations for your games in the short run.

ninocabral · Wednesday at 8:43 PM

Start studying more, you need to study the final stages of tournaments and the discipline of not tilting

chicbulls2 · Thursday at 5:52 AM

just like the most of us

Poker Orifice · Friday at 2:18 PM

I just noticed this League in the U.K. today on Partypoker in the 'Restricted' section (same section you'll find Cardschat freerolls).
A live poker league called 'Redtooth Poker Tour'. I think they're around $150 to enter but you can get into them in these games on Partypoker that start at 10pounds. ($15?). Some seem to even have 'tickets added'.

Redtooth Poker Tour - Redtooth Poker

Poker Orifice · Friday at 2:18 PM

Maybe you live close to one?

Rosylly · Friday at 2:22 PM

You have to study game, if you won’t, you’ll stuck in micros forever…

Maybe a poker dream is unrealistic for me

miklcct

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SpanRmonka

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Luvepoker

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