stupid things players say

gazrosenau · Jul 13, 2012

LIR0under said:
an online player who had exclusively played at pokerstars and tilt until black friday was sitting at my 1/2 and went through about 1200 bucks (me and one other guy had gotten the most of it as i was +700) , hesitated when reloading again and decided to get up. He says, "Gotta see if i can deposit on Carbon so i can play some real poker"

I almost fell off my chair laughing

Thud!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i just did funny shit that

Hardcorecake · Jul 13, 2012

After you make a call against a bad players bluff on river with bottom pair, "How do you make that call you DONK!"

blueskies · Jul 13, 2012

People love to call ppl "donks" nowadays. An idiot can slow play his KK and then goes nuts on the river even though a third spade hits and all he's got is an overpair. Loses to a flush and calls the other guy a donk.

I had this guy in an MTT say how I could move all my chips in with only K5 suited even though I was getting 3:1 to call the BTN's raise and would have been left with slightly more than 1 big blind if I folded.

imafin · Jul 14, 2012

Next time a player rants out to you that the site is rigged. Tell him or her, "Yea i know, my brother-in-law owns the site".

Tammy · Jul 14, 2012

I had a player tell me just the other day that my mother should obviously have aborted me when my AK held against his J/5 suited, all-in. Oh yeah, and apparently I'm an idiot too. lol

Leo 50 · Jul 14, 2012

I just ignore them all and keep playing.
If anyone’s going to berate my play, it’s me!

tbdbitl · Jul 14, 2012

"I know I'm beat. I call"

alaskabill · Jul 15, 2012

tbdbitl said:
"I know I'm beat. I call"

This is Negraneau on most episodes of HSP.

punch · Jul 23, 2012

The best thing i ever saw in the chatbox was someone say 'god can you donks stop it'. So someone replied 'stop what?!' and the response was 'stop raising so big when you're in the blinds or i'm going to find a different table'. The best bit was the other person who chimed up with 'they all do it mate they're all fish'.

pokerjack43 · Jul 23, 2012

JDAWG5 said:
Why???

That means you are getting money from the donks.

means theyre taking it more often than giving it ;-(

Hardcorecake · Jul 23, 2012

So on final table 3 left 1st in chips theres a guy basically pushing everytime....I get AJ BB he SB he pushes I call...he has j 2 this is where the fun starts "What BS you always have an A...You are the fking luckiest player, every fkn time!." had just beaten him like 12 hands ago to get 1st in chips withlike AK vs k10....this guy was pretty terrible. Anyway he flops the 2 and just continues ranting about how I am the luckiest player...best I figure guy just doesn't know the definition of the word lucky ;P

JDAWG5 · Jul 25, 2012

pokerjack43 said:
means theyre taking it more often than giving it ;-(

Your bluffing too much then.

kissapig · Jul 25, 2012

Run over by a herd of turtles.

strapdiesel · Jul 25, 2012

I hate when a bad player sucks out on me and then has the nerve to laugh at me.

LIR0under · Jul 26, 2012

guy who got beat with my set on bovada : "Die in a car accident you doosh"

my answer: "already did. they have online poker in hell"

Bowman · Jul 29, 2012

Don't really like to call anyone out or anyone dumb or stupid. They play their cards the way they want, up to them. They'ry time, they're dime. I don't like to be called out when I play a perticular hand. One may say that was a garbage hand. Some people have their reads at perticular times and hopefully they work out. Like the idea of sitting at a table with a webcam, sure I would say some dumb things forgetting my place. Would try this once or twice, for fun and to learn something. Help my game at a live table I am sure.

coyotegal · Jul 30, 2012

LIR0under said:
guy who got beat with my set on bovada : "Die in a car accident you doosh"

my answer: "already did. they have online poker in hell"

ROFL!!!!

coyotegal · Jul 30, 2012

was in a tourney today and had about 2 more bb's left. I was the small blind and got A6s. I knew that I had to get all my chips in if I could before the next bb and decided that I might do it then. utg raises 1x bb and everyone else folds, except the button who was big stacked. Big stack bids in 6X bb and I think...ya... he's in position... prob. tryin to steal blinds...and push all in. everyone else folds. He shows A5s the cards go to river and I win so he calls me a donk and starts berating my play... So i check his stats at sharkscope and comment to him that ya...I'm the donk cuz he is one point above me at sharkscope and his answer was "Sharkscope is over-rated" ...lol

Reptar7 · Jul 30, 2012

A lot of people tell me they hope I die of cancer for some reason. I just ignore it or report them.

I like it when people say stuff like, "I was 75.82% to win that," to which I reply "donk" or "u suck." ticks them off everytime.

Reptar7 · Jul 30, 2012

coyotegal said:
was in a tourney today and had about 2 more bb's left. I was the small blind and got A6s. I knew that I had to get all my chips in if I could before the next bb and decided that I might do it then. utg raises 1x bb and everyone else folds, except the button who was big stacked. Big stack bids in 6X bb and I think...ya... he's in position... prob. tryin to steal blinds...and push all in. everyone else folds. He shows A5s the cards go to river and I win so he calls me a donk and starts berating my play... So i check his stats at sharkscope and comment to him that ya...I'm the donk cuz he is one point above me at sharkscope and his answer was "Sharkscope is over-rated" ...lol

Um, 1. It is against the TOS to berate players about stats and 2. Sharkscope doesn't seem to work for me either.

coyotegal · Jul 30, 2012

Reptar7 said:
Um, 1. It is against the TOS to berate players about stats and 2. Sharkscope doesn't seem to work for me either.

1. Who's TOS...CC's or Merges...
2. I did not berate him... I agreed with him... I did not say his stats were bad or good...and called myself the donk... and him the pro....because he was one point above me.... there is a difference...
American Heritage Dictionary: be·rate

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Home > Library > Literature & Language > Dictionary
(bĭ-rāt')

tr.v., -rat·ed, -rat·ing, -rates.
To rebuke or scold angrily and at length. See synonyms at scold.

js520 · Jul 30, 2012

There's a couple of limpers into a pot and I have AK, I make a pot sized raise and both limpers call. I miss the flop and the first limper donkbets, the other limper and I both fold. the following conversation then took place between me and the limper that folded:

Him: "why did u raise before the flop"
Me: "I had a good hand"
Him: "so why did u fold on the flop"
Me: "because I missed"
Him: "you had f*** all"
Me: "lol AK is not f** all"
Him: "yes it is, 22 beats AK, now stop raising"

Lol

ovitoo · Aug 8, 2012

Small blind says: "check"

GambleOnRose · Aug 8, 2012

oacnaf said:
I once had someone (who had just busted out with every penny he had, sitting to my left) at a 5/10NL table ask me if he could borrow $5.45 for 24 hours.. Poor idiot called behind 2 all-in bets preflop with AK, other two players had AA and KK (wasn't online, surprisingly haha).. he lost $4.8K in a matter of seconds, then proceeded to ask me for $5.45 so he could go buy and smoke a cigarette for the first time in 25 years.. "Don't say anything to my wife when she comes back, I don't want her to know I'm smoking again"

Buddy, I'm pretty sure your wife's gonna be a little more pissed that you lost the last 4k in your pocket and still managed to go $5 in debt hahaha

lmao. funny stuff. I would hate to be his wife. People don't handle losing very well.

stupid things players say

gazrosenau

Rock Star

Hardcorecake

Rock Star

blueskies

Legend

imafin

Rock Star

Tammy

I'm Here to Help

Leo 50

Legend

tbdbitl

Legend

alaskabill

Legend

punch

Rising Star

pokerjack43

Rock Star

Hardcorecake

Rock Star

JDAWG5

Rock Star

kissapig

Rock Star

strapdiesel

Rising Star

LIR0under

Enthusiast

Bowman

Visionary

coyotegal

Rock Star

coyotegal

Rock Star

Reptar7

Visionary

Reptar7

Visionary

coyotegal

Rock Star

js520

Rock Star

ovitoo

Legend

GambleOnRose

Rising Star

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