funny chats at table.

someone said this today at a table I was at and found it very very funny, anyone else got some pastes they want to share?



Dealer: marcelluswa has reconnected
Jinxer: always has to be one jerk at every
table that feels they need to raise every
single hand . Gotta make up for lack of
skill somehow I guess.
Dealer: Brand7 has 15 seconds left to act
Brand7: ??
Dealer: Asgrow13 has 15 seconds left to
act
Dealer: Brand7 has 15 seconds left to act
Dealer: Brand7 shows two pair, Fours and
Twos
Dealer: stormswa shows two pair, Jacks
and Fours
Dealer: stormswa wins the pot ($10.85)
with two pair, Jacks and Fours
Dealer: Hand #2830249690

lmao thats great, I was playing the other day, dont have the paste but i was getting a great run of cards and was raising pretty much every hand and had a guy call me when I actually had aces because he said to me "I have to keep you honest with all your reckless play". Needless to say he doubled me up that hand lol

I'm going to have to start saving screenshots of these because some are hilarious.

Yesterday in a tourney on full tilt someone at my table lost all in pre with AK to KJ. He beraded the guy and kept saying "you stupid American's, you all overvalue KJ."

The guy replied "I'm from Australia."

I thought that was pretty funny.

HartAttack3 said:

lmao thats great, I was playing the other day, dont have the paste but i was getting a great run of cards and was raising pretty much every hand and had a guy call me when I actually had aces because he said to me "I have to keep you honest with all your reckless play". Needless to say he doubled me up that hand lol

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this guy is still sitting at table., Im raising every one of his blinds, I have the button when he is in big blind.

At a live home game between 2 friends.

Friend 1 had raised preflop, on the flop with a flop showing a flush draw, and then goes all in on the turn. (Player 1 is aggressive player.)

Friend 2 calls preflop, calls the flop bet, and calls the all in.(player 2 likes to chase draws, especially flush draws.)

Friend 1 shows top pair Ace with J kicker. Player 2 shows A6 suited, but not matching the board.

The river pairs the board and they both split the pot.

Friend 1: How the hell could you call an all in with A6?
Friend 2: I knew the board would pair and we would split the pot.

LMAO.

^Doesn't seem to funny to me.....

The American one was real funny though

arkadiy said:

^Doesn't seem to funny to me.....

The American one was real funny though

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Who the hell calls in hopes of getting a split pot? And they werent hoping for a split, they said "I KNEW the board would pair."

philthy said:

Who the hell calls in hopes of getting a split pot? And they werent hoping for a split, they said "I KNEW the board would pair."

Click to expand...

Just saying it wasn't funny to me

arkadiy said:

Just saying it wasn't funny to me

Click to expand...

My mistake. I must have misread/misunderstood.

just happened to me tonight, so funny, im high so i was messin with him and he just flipped lol

SGTDeadMoney (Observer): way to call an all-in
with Q high
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): $##$@
HartAttack31: way to go all in with 6 high
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I had a straight draw
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): plus I was pot
committed
HartAttack31: and he didnt need a draw
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): !@@& off
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): you all suck
HartAttack31: so it was the correct call
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope all of you are
in car accidents, and die
Nov11: he waited too long & looked desperate
HartAttack31: i like internet rants
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope you all burn in
the fiery pits of hell
El Griton: dang...
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope all of your
houses's smell like a baby's coffin
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): just for you
HartAttack....
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I wish I knew where
you lived, so I could come over and fart in your
dinner
El Griton: God Bless you SGTMONEY
Dealer: El Griton has 15 seconds left to act
r1chance: lol
HartAttack31: I LOVE YOU!
HartAttack31: I WAS LOOKIN AT MY OTHER
TABLE I LOVE YOU!
El Griton: Go in Peace my Son


that was just too funny

actually that's not funny, that is sad and past the line. I cant do it right now I need to go to bed but I plan on pasting this to Full Tilt tomorrow because some of the things he said are way past the line.



this part really pisses me off.

HartAttack3 said:

El Griton: dang...
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope all of your
houses's smell like a baby's coffin

Click to expand...

I think you all know why but if you dont click the 1st link in my signature.

I agree with Brian that most of the rant was way out of line, but this part got me...

HartAttack3 said:

SGTDeadMoney (Observer): just for you
HartAttack....
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I wish I knew where
you lived, so I could come over and fart in your
dinner
El Griton: God Bless you SGTMONEY
Dealer: El Griton has 15 seconds left to act
r1chance: lol
HartAttack31: I LOVE YOU!
HartAttack31: I WAS LOOKIN AT MY OTHER
TABLE I LOVE YOU!
El Griton: Go in Peace my Son

Click to expand...

Besides that, there's no reason to threaten anyone... it's online poker people.

actully I wont be able to sleep I will send it now.

sorry to be anal about this but this kinda stuff can not be allowed, this is my email to full tilt chat abuse.


I just go this transcript from one of the forums I frequent and needless to say im very very very upset. I will bold the parts I think are horrible.


SGTDeadMoney (Observer): way to call an all-in
with Q high
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): $##$@
HartAttack31: way to go all in with 6 high
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I had a straight draw
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): plus I was pot
committed
HartAttack31: and he didnt need a draw
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): !@@& off
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): you all suck
HartAttack31: so it was the correct call
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope all of you are
in car accidents, and die
Nov11: he waited too long & looked desperate
HartAttack31: i like internet rants
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope you all burn in
the fiery pits of hell
El Griton: dang...
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope all of your
houses's smell like a baby's coffin
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): just for you
HartAttack....
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I wish I knew where
you lived, so I could come over and fart in your
dinner
El Griton: God Bless you SGTMONEY
Dealer: El Griton has 15 seconds left to act
r1chance: lol
HartAttack31: I LOVE YOU!
HartAttack31: I WAS LOOKIN AT MY OTHER
TABLE I LOVE YOU!
El Griton: Go in Peace my Son


the part about the baby's coffin is really bad, I had a son that has passed and cant believe people are allowed to talk like this on your site. I have played on your site for years now and if you allow something like this I will not play any longer. I will not play your site until you do something about this, my next deposit is going on stars and I will be awaiting your email to decide If I will ever play on your site again or if I should remove your software from my computer. I await your response and the ball is in your court.

Wow storm, That is one harsh E-mail, necessary under the circumstances and your feelings involved, but Harsh.
Such passion in any E-mail I have ever read and I can Guarantee that your message will come across loud and clear.
Great E-mail BTW.

wow guys yea im sorry, I didnt mean to be offensive to ya at all storm, I actually totally forot about that (slipped my mind) I apologize, definitely feel awful. If it helps at all that his account gets frozen or he gets banned im glad I could help by posting it.

wow, that guy had mental/losing issues

yeah he was creepy and and disrespectful, @ first you think the guy is
a sore loser, but the words get darker as he goes on,

I hope all of your
houses's smell like a baby's coffin

Click to expand...

HartAttack3 said:

just happened to me tonight, so funny, im high so i was messin with him and he just flipped lol

SGTDeadMoney (Observer): way to call an all-in
with Q high
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): $##$@
HartAttack31: way to go all in with 6 high
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I had a straight draw
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): plus I was pot
committed
HartAttack31: and he didnt need a draw
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): !@@& off
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): you all suck
HartAttack31: so it was the correct call
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope all of you are
in car accidents, and die
Nov11: he waited too long & looked desperate
HartAttack31: i like internet rants
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope you all burn in
the fiery pits of hell
El Griton: dang...
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I hope all of your
houses's smell like a baby's coffin
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): just for you
HartAttack....
SGTDeadMoney (Observer): I wish I knew where
you lived, so I could come over and fart in your
dinner
El Griton: God Bless you SGTMONEY
Dealer: El Griton has 15 seconds left to act
r1chance: lol
HartAttack31: I LOVE YOU!
HartAttack31: I WAS LOOKIN AT MY OTHER
TABLE I LOVE YOU!
El Griton: Go in Peace my Son


that was just too funny

Click to expand...

arkadiy said:

Just saying it wasn't funny to me

Click to expand...

lol everyones a critic nowadays it seems

lol too pokernut...that is hilarious what that guy said! Yeah im going to have too start saving them too and posting them on here.

Funny how you get these idiots ranting online, yet in a casino the worst you get a few dodgy looks and crys of donkey!

lol i know really! They only say that stuff because they are behind a computer.

AhmushyBaby: whats the point of mini raising with low pocket pairs?

jimmiijimjim: to catch a set and double I think

AhmushyBaby: whats wrong with limping

AhmushyBaby: its the same thing

AhmushyBaby: lol

jimmiijimjim: well raising to 60 meant there was twice as much in the pot

jimmiijimjim: or would that be wrong?

AhmushyBaby: lol

jimmiijimjim: and the BB was sitting out

AhmushyBaby: thats si funny man

AhmushyBaby: twice as much in the pot but your odds of hittin a set are still like 17 percent


this was after he mini raised with pocket 5's and cracked my kings on the flop. i wish i had raised pre flop.

full tilts response

Hello Brian,

Thank you for your email to Full Tilt Poker Customer Support about your

chat observation.

We will certainly look into your chat complaint and take appropriate
action.

Meanwhile, if you want to block a player's messages, you may follow
these steps:

1) Right-click on their Player ID in the chat window
2) Select "Player Notes"
3) Click on "Options"
4) Check "Ignore Chat"

By checking the ignore chat option, the player's chat will not be
visible in your chat window.

We appreciate your help in maintaining a fun and enjoyable atmosphere
here at Full Tilt Poker. Please do not hesitate to send future chat
violations to [email protected], and remember to include the
person's Player ID and a copy of the conversation. We will always do
our
best to address your concerns.

If there is anything else we can help you with Brian, please let us
know. We are always happy to help.

Kindest regards,

John G
Full Tilt Poker Support

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Please remember never to give out your password or enter
account details over the Internet. Full Tilt Poker staff will
never ask you for your password. For your security, always
keep this information a secret.



and mine back as follows.


this is not good enough at all, in a real casino this guy would 1st most likely get his ass kicked and then would be banned from the casino. You are telling me to block his chat? I should not have to even be witness to this kind of crap on your site. If you continue to let this crap happen then your site will become known as a place that will put up with this horrible stupidity. I plan on copying these emails on all the forums I frequent and I along with all the millions of users the frequent these forums will await your response.

my strategy has always been to igore or turn off chats. i think people try to play mind games or get reads out of you.

amygrantfan said:

my strategy has always been to igore or turn off chats. i think people try to play mind games or get reads out of you.

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calling someone a donk or calling station or something along those lines is different then this.

these are way way beyond the line of innocent chat to try to tilt someone.