*** January's Juxtaposed Pokahz Chat ***

eNTy said:

There should be a special level in hell reserved just for the driving license examinators. THEY SHOULD DIE SLOW AND HORRIBLE.

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IMO, when they die, driving license examinators just continue doing the same job in hell to punish people who were even more evil than them. I picture Hitler, Stalin, Polpot and their likes parallel parking for eons and it makes me giggle.

sorry about your exam, enty. you'll get it next time i guess.

WVHillbilly said:

Parallel parking bad beat???

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Nope my parallel parking was off the charts, I completely owned the maneuvers shizzle.

BelgoSuisse said:

IMO, when they die, driving license examinators just continue doing the same job in hell to punish people who were even more evil than them. I picture Hitler, Stalin, Polpot and their likes parallel parking for eons and it makes me giggle.

sorry about your exam, enty. you'll get it next time i guess.

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True dat. Next go is Feb 10. I better get it then or I'll have to take lessons again pff.

The stuff they say is so ridic. If you judge people like that everyone fails. And like 70% do as a result. They said I didn't drive defensive enough, cause I drove too fast. While in reality like 80% of the exam I was doing 30 km/h cause of the 30 zones and the ice and snow on the roads. Mthrfker even said I used my clutch too much. Come on he just made that sh1t up! How can you use you're clutch too much when you only use it to change ears or brake .

My friend even failed cause they said he signaled to early before a turn. I mean lmfao how is that a mistake. It's not like he was signaling 2 turns before or anything.

Imo they just fail so many people cause they bigoted little people with a shitty job and no life, get payed crappy and therefor fail the majority so they can get more $$$iez.

BelgoSuisse said:

BelugaWhale Theorem - When you are the preflop raiser and your turn bet is raised or check/raise, it is time to re-evaluate one pair hands.

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Oh thanks, I didn't know there was a name for that!

Jagsti said:

Regarding the grapsh, I have just cleared the 200k Vpp milestones bonus worth $2k, but I have been on a big dowswong whilst clearing it. As soon as I clear it ...

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Of course. The graph starts right after you've cleared it! Man, sometimes I'm so sloooooow. Dementia, going on 30 imo.


Sooo, I said I wasn't gonna do it, and I may move down to 100NL for a while to dampen the inevitable doomswitch that's about to follow. But running goot right after moving up feels too fracking awesome not to visualize.

[ ]sustainable
[x]cue doomswitch
[x]fun anyway

^^^^^ ****ing sweet graph!!!

[x] $4900 a day

give....

Chris_TC said:

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[x] serious brag

went to watch a few hands on tableratings.com . You were still rebuilding at 100nl 30 days ago ??? That's just insane.

Also, do you table select really good or is it standard to see someone shove preflop with 77 at 1000nl ?

lol in the US they don't care if you can drive. All they care about is if you can parallel park, go in reverse (just straight back on a straight really wide private road), turn around, stop at stop signs, and keep the car under 15 MPH.

And Chris, ****ing amazing graph .

zachvac said:

lol in the US they don't care if you can drive. All they care about is if you can parallel park, go in reverse (just straight back on a straight really wide private road), turn around, stop at stop signs, and keep the car under 15 MPH.

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In Belgium even if you drive well, they still **** you
Oh and I feel bad for US driving mostly automatics, where's the fun if you dont have a stick

eNTy said:

In Belgium even if you drive well, they still **** you

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Not always. I got mine at the first try and i did get my license in Belgium.

But yes, they are just looking for any excuse to fail you. A friend of mine was told he was driving too slow (he was just respecting limits) and that the inspector felt it meant he didn't feel secure enough. wtf?

Jesus that is the sexiest graph I've ever seen. Very nice work Chris!

After those hands at 1kNL u probably have a real nice BR for 400/600NL right? Any chance u will play those for awhile with a lot of BIs instead of playing with only like 18?

BelgoSuisse said:

Also, do you table select really good or is it standard to see someone shove preflop with 77 at 1000nl ?

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Not much table selection going on at 1000nl because there aren't enough tables, at least not during the day (European time). As far as the 4-bet shove with 77 goes... the idea is that my 3-betting range is super-wide and that I can call his shove with only a fraction. It's very high variance and probably marginal at best.

eNTy said:

Oh and I feel bad for US driving mostly automatics, where's the fun if you dont have a stick

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That's what I used to say, but driving an automatic is sooooo much more relaxing. Also, automatics are faster than manuals nowadays. The current Porsche Turbo accelerates faster with the automatic gearbox than a professional race driver with the manual version.

bw07507 said:

After those hands at 1kNL u probably have a real nice BR for 400/600NL right? Any chance u will play those for awhile with a lot of BIs instead of playing with only like 18?

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Well, I'm obviously considerably past 18 buy-ins now, but it's funny you mention it. I really am entertaining the thought of playing $2/$4 or $3/$6 for a while because being overrolled must be the NUTS.

LOL, funniest hand I've played in awhile

Poker Stars, $1/$2 NL Hold'em Cash Game, 6 Players
Hand History Converter by Stoxpoker

UTG: $137.45 (68.7 bb)
MP: $109.85 (54.9 bb)
CO: $231.40 (115.7 bb)
Hero (BTN): $202 (101 bb)
SB: $185.60 (92.8 bb)
BB: $68.80 (34.4 bb)

Pre-Flop: Hero is BTN with 2 A
UTG raises to $6, MP calls $6, CO folds, Hero raises to $26, SB folds, BB calls $24, UTG calls $20, MP folds

Flop: ($85) 9 5 7 (3 players)
BB checks, UTG checks, Hero checks

Turn: ($85) K (3 players)
BB checks, UTG checks, Hero bets $40, BB raises to $42.80 and is all-in, UTG calls $42.80, Hero calls $2.80

River: ($213.40) 4 (3 players, 1 is all-in)
UTG checks, Hero checks

Results: $213.40 pot ($3.00 rake)
BB showed T J (high card King) and lost (-$68.80 net)
UTG showed T J (high card King) and lost (-$68.80 net)
Hero showed 2 A (high card Ace) and won $210.40 ($141.60 net)

Chris_TC said:

Well, I'm obviously considerably past 18 buy-ins now, but it's funny you mention it. I really am entertaining the thought of playing $2/$4 or $3/$6 for a while because being overrolled must be the NUTS.

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Seriously Chris, please do this. You could easily earn $5-10k per month playing at 2/4 3/6. We don't want another train wreck! Build it up gradually now. You know from past experience that operating with only a few buy ins is pretty much suicide.

You can still play regularly at 1knl when you've built your roll up for it.

Sorry for preaching!

bw07507 said:

LOL, funniest hand I've played in awhile

Poker Stars, $1/$2 NL Hold'em Cash Game, 6 Players
Hand History Converter by Stoxpoker

UTG: $137.45 (68.7 bb)
MP: $109.85 (54.9 bb)
CO: $231.40 (115.7 bb)
Hero (BTN): $202 (101 bb)
SB: $185.60 (92.8 bb)
BB: $68.80 (34.4 bb)

Pre-Flop: Hero is BTN with 2

A

UTG raises to $6, MP calls $6, CO folds, Hero raises to $26, SB folds, BB calls $24, UTG calls $20, MP folds

Flop: ($85) 9

5

7

(3 players)
BB checks, UTG checks, Hero checks

Turn: ($85) K

(3 players)
BB checks, UTG checks, Hero bets $40, BB raises to $42.80 and is all-in, UTG calls $42.80, Hero calls $2.80

River: ($213.40) 4

(3 players, 1 is all-in)
UTG checks, Hero checks

Results: $213.40 pot ($3.00 rake)
BB showed T

J

(high card King) and lost (-$68.80 net)
UTG showed T

J

(high card King) and lost (-$68.80 net)
Hero showed 2

A

(high card Ace) and won $210.40 ($141.60 net)

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Don't bluff when you have 0 FE imo.

zachvac said:

Don't bluff when you have 0 FE imo.

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It was clearly a value bet

move up to 25/50 quick before ur boomswitch runs out

I'm seeing some weird loose shit in the DONs today

Poker Stars, $20.80 Buy-in (15/30 blinds) NL Hold'em Tourney, 10 Players
Hand History Converter by Stoxpoker

SB: 56.3 bb
BB: 52 bb
UTG: 53.7 bb
UTG+1: 52.5 bb
UTG+2: 49 bb
MP1: 47 bb
Hero (MP2): 49.2 bb
MP3: 49 bb
CO: 42.8 bb
BTN: 48.5 bb

Pre-Flop: Hero is MP2 with 2 2
4 folds, Hero raises to 3 bb, 3 folds, SB calls 2.5 bb, BB folds

Flop: (7 bb) 9 4 A (2 players)
SB checks, Hero bets 4 bb, SB calls 4 bb

Turn: (15 bb) 6 (2 players)
SB checks, Hero checks

River: (15 bb) K (2 players)
SB checks, Hero checks

Results: 15 bb pot
SB showed 8 6 (a pair of Sixes) and won 15 bb (8 bb net)
Hero mucked 2 2 (a pair of Twos) and lost (-7 bb net)

CO: 48 bb
BTN: 48.2 bb
SB: 48 bb
BB: 30.3 bb
UTG: 45.2 bb
Hero (UTG+1): 61.7 bb
UTG+2: 44.7 bb
MP1: 48.2 bb
MP2: 74.5 bb
MP3: 51.3 bb

Pre-Flop: Hero is UTG+1 with K A
UTG raises to 5 bb, Hero raises to 61.7 bb and is all-in, 7 folds, BB calls 29.3 bb and is all-in, UTG calls 40.2 bb and is all-in

Flop: (121.2 bb) 3 5 4 (3 players, 3 are all-in)
Turn: (121.2 bb) 6 (3 players, 3 are all-in)
River: (121.2 bb) 8 (3 players, 3 are all-in)

Results: 121.2 bb pot
UTG showed J A (high card Ace) and lost (-45.2 bb net)
Hero showed K A (a flush, Ace high) and won 121.2 bb (76 bb net)
BB showed T K (high card King) and lost (-30.3 bb net)

BB obv made a hero call and got unlucky.
When they both called I was like hmmm , but then they flipped their cards and I was like LOL

eNTy said:

Pre-Flop: Hero is UTG+1 with K

A

UTG raises to 5 bb, Hero raises to 61.7 bb and is all-in, 7 folds, BB calls 29.3 bb and is all-in, UTG calls 40.2 bb and is all-in

Flop: (121.2 bb) 3

5

4

(3 players, 3 are all-in)
Turn: (121.2 bb) 6

(3 players, 3 are all-in)
River: (121.2 bb) 8

(3 players, 3 are all-in)

Results: 121.2 bb pot
UTG showed J

A

(high card Ace) and lost (-45.2 bb net)
Hero showed K

A

(a flush, Ace high) and won 121.2 bb (76 bb net)
BB showed T

K

(high card King) and lost (-30.3 bb net)

BB obv made a hero call and got unlucky.
When they both called I was like hmmm , but then they flipped their cards and I was like LOL

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mbn

vanquish said:

mbn

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fwiw I have no clue wth mbn is supposed to be imo, explain ldo. cya bb ttyl.

Is this standard ? $11 180 sng.
Poker Stars, $11 Buy-in (25/50 blinds) NL Hold'em Tourney, 9 Players
Hand History Converter by Stoxpoker

MP1: 32 bb
MP2: 50.8 bb
MP3: 28.5 bb
CO: 17.1 bb
BTN: 53.6 bb
SB: 32 bb
Hero (BB): 31.9 bb
UTG: 65.4 bb
UTG+1: 23.9 bb

Pre-Flop: Hero is BB with K A
3 folds, MP2 raises to 2 bb, MP3 calls 2 bb, 2 folds, SB calls 1.5 bb, Hero raises to 8 bb, 2 folds, SB calls 6 bb

Flop: (20 bb) T J 6 (2 players)
SB checks, Hero bets 23.9 bb and is all-in, SB calls 23.9 bb

Turn: (67.8 bb) 8 (2 players, 1 is all-in)
River: (67.8 bb) 9 (2 players, 1 is all-in)

Results: 67.8 bb pot
SB showed J Q (a straight, Eight to Queen) and won 67.8 bb (35.9 bb net)
Hero showed K A (high card Ace) and lost (-31.9 bb net)

eNTy said:

Is this standard ?

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your 3bet is a little low. the rest is standard. you need to post this in the HA forums, not here. Just link here to the thread you want us to comment on if that's needed.

mbn = Must Be Nice

Chris_TC said:

[ ]sustainable
[x]cue doomswitch
[x]fun anyway

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Im trying to find a word to describe this graph....cant....
Just awsome

BelgoSuisse said:

your 3bet is a little low. the rest is standard. you need to post this in the HA forums, not here. Just link here to the thread you want us to comment on if that's needed.

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K sorry

Too used to posting 80% of the time in this thread

also, fwiw going minorly ape shit with pocket 2's in a DON prob aint too great. By ape shit i mean raising and cbetting the flop as wild as it seems

Ysy! found two multitabling fishes! Moneyzzz !!!

gotta stop posting and focus on grinding.