Have Any Good Poker Jokes?

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Talk two players:
“They say poker is a heartless game!”
Second:
-Nothing like this! For example, yesterday we had one at the card table died, so we stood up the game standing up!
 
vidos2505 said:
Talk two players:
“They say poker is a heartless game!”
Second:
-Nothing like this! For example, yesterday we had one at the card table died, so we stood up the game standing up!
Click to expand...
😀😀😀
 
The English lord returns home in the morning, walks into the bedroom and says to his wife:
“I'm sorry, dear, but you have to move to another man — I lost you at cards.”
- Lost ?! God, how can this be !!!
- How, how ... Very simple: I did not notice the peak king.
 
vidos2505 said:
The game of poker was delayed until the morning. A player's angry wife goes out and shouts:
- When will all this end in our house? !!!
Husband reassures:
- Take it easy, dear! This is not our home ...
Click to expand...


This one's great 😀
 
School. Elementary classes.

Teacher: - Ira, and by whom does your dad work?

- My dad is a fisherman! )

- Just some weird. unhappy

Teacher: - This is why strange?

Ira: - Well, he is sitting at home in front of a computer all the time, and his mother says that the fish feed us!
 
EVA777 said:
😛layingbaIf in life there was no entertainment, games, funny stories, then it would be completely gray, uninteresting! :boring::boring::boring:In Russia, they tell a lot of jokes about everything in the world - this is a short humor - anecdote.
About poker I have never heard ... Do they exist?
Can anyone know? Let's have some fun together!:five:
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I think that rolls many jokes when playing live poker online than from my point of view.
 
good ago I was playing poker with my friends mostly for fun and after a few hours all with a stacks more or less decent player to my right makes a bet more or less strong and I see my ace cards and king of spades so I decide to equal everyone, the flop turns out to turn out to be 7 / J / 9 all of spades and the player continues with his aggressiveness and I keep equaling the turn and throws a 4 of spades and keeps going up and I equaling and the river a 5 of spades where my friend decides to go all in and I call he tells me I have nothing was bluffing I had 8/3 diamond I say color to Ace when I say ace color and turn my cards turn out to be from trees I only saw my houses once and they turned out be tremas and not swords at the end conpartimos the pot but it was very funny I've been the moment😀
 
Ask the debtor:

- When will you pay your debt?

- I did not know that you are so curious - the debtor answers
 
A good regular player of online tournaments in 5 minutes of a break has time to go to the toilet, smoke, plant a tree, check the son’s diary and complain about bad luck on the forum.
 
A cowboy walks into a bar, and there are three men and a dog sitting at a table
and play poker.
- Well, smart dog! - says the cowboy.
One of the players:
- No, stupid, when she has a good card, she’s wagging her tail.😀😀😀😀
 
EVA777 said:
A good regular player of online tournaments in 5 minutes of a break has time to go to the toilet, smoke, plant a tree, check the son’s diary and complain about bad luck on the forum.
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And tea and coffee !!! 😀😀😀
 
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wlad20082009 said:
And tea and coffee !!! 😀😀😀
Click to expand...

😀😀😀:smokin::toilet:😛epsi::eating: Precious 5 minutes ... and tea ... and coffee ...😀😀😀:congrats::congrats::congrats:
 
The bride and groom discuss their future life together. - Promise me, dear, that you will refuse poker. - Yes, love. - And from smoking. - Yes, my pussy. - And from the beer. - It's all? - And what else do you think to give up? - From marriage.
 
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Faking orgasm is like playing poker I don't care if u lie while am the winner
 
The loser poker player is angry at the opponent:
- Well, on the one hand you're a freak, of course.
- And on the other?
- And on the other hand you have a back.
 
Poker player after a long tournament:
- Honey, are you sleeping?
- No, I have not slept yet ...
- Honey, I want to eat!
- I `am already sleep!
 
Fresh joke as a gift to all of you !!!

- New 2019 will be the year of whom?
- Pigs.
- It is a pity ... that again the year is not human.
 
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Wife, come on, get ready, I lost you in poker.
- How so?
- Oh, do not tell, he was upset. I almost blew my award,
well - I stopped on time.:driver:
 
One guy played poker all the time. Once he was sitting at a table of $ 10/20, with a stack of only $ 300. Suddenly, under the table, he noticed a little green man. “Stop playing poker right now and I'll give you a pot of gold for a million dollars,” said Leprikon. The guy replied: "No, let's half at once.":ciao::icon_porc
 
Gambling Joke

I overheard this while riding up to my room at Caesar's in Vegas.
A man was yelling at his wife for losing the $100 he gave her at slots so fast.
She yelled back at him, "I only lost $100.00 you lost $10,000.00".
The husband shot back, "ya, but I know how to gamble".😉
 
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